That You May KNow ~ Angelita E. Tenorio

Listen to what my heart says, forgiveness is not a question, I NEVER hated you.


I gave my all to love you... even if embracing you meant I will be bruised and cut to my very heart, still I embraced you, with hopes that if you see me bleeding you will lay down your armour of thorns and nails.... but, you didn't. In fact even your eyes, they've become so sharp, that in everytime you look at me … you cut me so deep, it penetrated to the very dephts of my soul.

I wanted to risk it all, even if embracing you means enduring pain at its essence and bleeding to death... but, lately it felt like pain has died in me. Pain seemed to have vanished into the oblivion of my soul... am I dead? have I died already?

In the absence of pain, I didn't notice I have stopped embracing you. In the absence of pain, I didn't notice I have removed my arms around you. In the absence of pain, I didn't notice I have stepped away from you...

In the absence of pain, I thought I have died already... I thought I have died already, instinctively I removed my arms around you and stepped away... I stepped away, fearing death will embrace you as well...

you have bruised me, and cut me to the very depths of my soul and... I died. but even in death, I gave my all to love you. I removed my hands around you and stepped away so death will not be able to get hold of you.

so please let go...

behold me no longer with your sharp eyes... as you have let me die, please let me dwell in my death peacefully.

COLD by Angel Tenorio

cold...


I look around,
and no one's there...

I yell out loud,
but no one hears...


cold...


i smile,
but no one to smile to...

i reach out,
but no hands to hold...


cold...


in this world of darkness,
in this world of loneliness,
where no one smiles back,
and no hands to hold,
one can only be nothing but...


COLD.

Bleeding by Angelita Tenorio

BLEEDING

"It's still wet,

don't touch yet...

beautiful isn't it?"

"why there's red,

there at the side of the tree,

and the water surrounding it?"

Smiling, she looked at him,

"I don't know. I am just a painter,

and I just painted your tree."

He looked at her.

Puzzled, he asked,

"is the tree bleeding? but trees don't have blood,

do they?"

"Why are you asking me?

It's your tree,

I'm just a painter..."

"You really are weird Legna," Joe said.

Smiling he examined the painting once again.

"So, I am the man standing beside the bleeding tree. And that,

bleeding tree is mine... Hmmm doesn't make sense."

"Yes, it doesn't make sense indeed, 

it doesn't make sense"

Smiling,

she looked at the work of her hands,

 standing beside Joe. 

This is a poem for my first painting, Bleeding - oil on canvass.

Sad Truth (Angel Tenorio)

how could I do this...

staring at you,

yet I look through you.

How could I do this,

you imprison me in your arms,

while I dream of being free.

How could I do this...

I lay beside you,

But my thoughts are of the lofty heights.

You'll hate me,

I know...

But what can I do.

Yes you have me,

but not my heart,

not my soul....

Forgive Me... (Angel Tenorio)

Forgive me,

I am not being selfish.

I am just being true...

There had never been a bridge

from the very start,

so I never had crossed

to your shore,

i never was by your side.

I pray, stop pretending,

and forgive me...

I am not being selfish,

we just need to be true.

Tatay

this poem is for my beloved Tatay.... I miss you so much....

i love you...

open your eyes to me,
listen...
i miss you...

whenever I hold your hands,
do you feel me...
do you know that it is I, your Angel...
or do you know me still?

i'm scared... scared so much,
scared you don't remember me anymore,
scared you don't know me anymore...

Tatay.... I love you.
do you hear me?
listen.... 
stand up...
and give me that hug,
All my life, the one hug
I so longed to have...
Tatay...

MUTE by Angel Tenorio

I can speak...

but I can't understand,

why can't you seem to hear me?

I speak your language,

but why?

the words I say,

seemed always strange to you...

mute...

I am not mute...

But even them,

they can be understood.

But why me?

I am not mute,

but to you, it seems

that I don't say a thing,

It seems that I cannot say a thing...

ME by Angel Tenorio

it's not you...

it's not that I can't forgive you.

it's just that

I do not hate you,

much more, blame you.

it's me...

I sort of hate myself,

and i can't seem to forgive me,

and all the blame is on me,

this couldn't have happened

if in the first place,

i have been true to myself

ME by Angel Tenorio

it's not you...

it's not that I can't forgive you.

it's just that

I do not hate you,

much more, blame you.

it's me...

I sort of hate myself,

and i can't seem to forgive me,

and all the blame is on me,

this couldn't have happened

if in the first place,

i have been true to myself

Is It? (Angel Tenorio)

is it selfishness

to be true,

to myself,

and especially you?

is it weakness,

to stop pretending,

and just be true?

is it wrong,

to walk in the truth,

to live in truth?

you tell me,

i know not what i am doing,

i know not what i am saying.

yes, 

you're right...

i don't know,

i have stopped knowing,

since i started pretending.

since we started living pretensions...